I love you...

Have you ever thought about the weight those three words have? The impact they have on someone? Remember when you were in a new relationship and you would wonder "when will he say those three words?" Or maybe you thought "When will I say those three words" Or maybe you remember dreaming of the day you would "fall in love". Its a blissful feeling. We hear it a lot, in passing as our days get busy its a hurried "I love you" as we run out the door. But when you really sit and think about it, love... God says Love is the greatest of all. So it must be something powerful, is it powerful enough to save a life? When someone is at such a low point in their life that they are contimplating suicide, they often say "nobody loves me." What if you told them "God loves you and I LOVE YOU?" Would it be enough? When two people are getting ready to split they often say "I will always love you but I am not IN LOVE with you" Does that even make sense? Is it strong enough to renew a relationship? When was the last time you told your spouse "I love you" in a meaninful way? When was the last time you hugged your children and told them "I love you." Those probably come easily to you, right? But when was the last time you told your grandparents "I love you"? When was the last time you told your parents "I love you"? Maybe you say it at the end of each phone call, or every so many phone calls. When was the last time you told you siblings "I love you"?


Well for me, I just told my husband on the way home from dinner "I love you". I try to tell my grandparents and mom "I love you" when I end each conversation but sometimes it goes unsaid. My sister hears it less often than my mom does and that makes me sad. Why are we in such a hurry that we don't say it more often?


But for my brother it had been probably 5 years. I can't believe that much time has passed! I remember the last time my brother and I told each other "I love you". We had gotten into an arguement, a huge one and I was moving out of my dad's house (I was living there alone until my brother, his girlfriend and 3 kids moved in) but I had had enough. I was fighting with his girlfriend and that made me fight with my brother. I packed up all my stuff and I was moving. It was November 2005. I had my car packed to the max and I was grabbing the last few items out of the house and he came up to me and wrapped his arms around my neck and said "I'm sorry things turned out like this. I am going to miss you and I want you to know that I love you." This was an emotional moment for the both of us and I said "I'm sorry too and I will always love you."
My brother and I were always close growing up, we told each other everything. But all of that love seemed to instantly go away less than a year later. Another baby was born, a baby that didn't belong to my brother and his girlfriend's violent behavior got worse. Many things had led up to this point, but all it took was one phone call from my brother to me in a panic about the threats that were being made to his young son. I told him "You better do something about it!" A week later my sister picked up two out of four of the children and they told graphic stories of "what mommy did". All it took was that and one phone call and one day later and I had 4 babies on my doorstep. That next year my husband was deployed to Korea and I became a "single mother of 4" overnight. Two weeks later the baby who wasn't my brothers child was taken to a foster home and I had the oldest 3 for an entire year. The year before we moved to Italy. That year was filled with pure hatred from my brother, anger, and him blaming me for what had happened. After a few weeks of unkind words from him and threats from his girlfriend we stopped talking to each other. Now here we are, so ironically, almost exactley 5 years later from the last time we said "I love you." I don't know what it was, but I felt like I needed to reach out....


I took a shot in the dark and said what has been on my heart for 5 years....




The only way I knew how to get a hold of him and I sent him a message....




 and I told him "I love you and I will always love you!"




and he reached back....




and said "I love you too"....